That’s right. We’re finally doing it. We’re testing a new version of the newsletter and it’s different. Did we just give ourselves bangs or are we rocking the Rachel? You tell us.

This week, it’s literally just a bunch of snippets from what we chatted about in our individual group texts, with each other, and what we want to chat about with you.

Skylar: 🤬 Netflix’s Age of Attraction was announced last month, I was grossed out and fully seated from the second I saw the trailer. A dating show where contestants would not know the actual age of each other? Netflix reality world girlies, we have a live one, and lots to chat about. (Starting with, why does Nick Viall have zero personality? Does this man really have a podcast?!)

🃏 I saw the pic of Jessica Alba and Joe Burrow, and like the internet, was convinced we had a new couple alert. I was so sure, I brought it up to my boyfriend and went to google (still the top search when you start to type “Joe Burrow…”) and realized, I was a victim of social clickbait.

🏠 Neighbors on HBO. Each episode has taken me on a journey, and my group chat has never been more active than after a new drop. If your chat is like mine, you probably want to know more about the woman who told us “this is my current skin suit.”

🏆 The Oscars are tonight, and this is my super bowl. I’ve filled out my prediction ballot and I’m ready to cry at speeches. Like all Academy Award faithfuls, I’m mostly curious to see if Timothee really will show us “How to Lose an Oscar in 10 Days.”

🎥 Billie Eilish will be making her acting debut in The Bell Jar adaptation, and English majors all over are intrigued.

🍿 The Love is Blind Season 10 Reunion gave us some closure and some distinct questions about girl code (I feel a substack deep dive about “Breezy Behavior” coming soon)

💸This week Elle Fanning revealed she created an OnlyFans to prepare for her role in the TV show adaptation of Margo’s Got Money Troubles (one of my fave books I read last year!)

Carol: 🔨 I am living for the world wide web’s reaction to Donna Kelce’s home renovation. When every headline is a dumpster fire, sometimes the internet delivers exactly what you need: a hilariously overblown reaction to something that absolutely should not be news.

🐬 Did I make my boyfriend watch the Florida Man Dolphin Kidnapping story with full, genuine late-night intrigue? Yes. Did I spend several minutes explaining how the ocean is mostly unexplored and therefore mysteries of this magnitude are entirely possible? Also yes. Did a video appear moments later confirming it was, of course, completely fabricated? Yes. Still, we gotta dream people.

🍸 I visited the Campari bar in Milan yesterday. As a girlie who’s go-to cocktail is a negroni, Campari is important to my personal brand and this did not disappoint. The bar was busy, but gorgeous but even on a rainy day, the view was hard to beat.

It’s been a solid 15 days since I’ve seen a meaningful amount of vegetables. As I informed a fellow girlie:

What We Chatted to Each Other About:

Since meeting, Carol has received no less than five medical advice questions and spirals from me, and this week was no different. Like all good friend chats it immediately evolved to doomsday fantasizing.

🎙️Never have we ever felt so seen.

Things always taking up time in our average 5-9 minute memos:

📚 Charlotte, NC 3/27 at OMB

🎤 Charlotte, NC 3/29 at Duckworths Comedy Club

🌊 Charleston, SC 5/14 at Barre 3

🛋️ Knoxville, TN 5/27 at The Design Center by Design AF

🌟 Wytheville, VA 6/12 at the Millwald

🍷 Livermore, CA 6/26 at 3 Steves

Save the date, 🎟️ links coming soon Nashville (5/28), San Diego (6/18), and Phoenix (10/15)

Missed all our words and spirals? Catch up on our Substack.

For the girlies who still want more and want to stay off the scrolling, here’s a thread on intellectual stimulations to explore.