Our next live show is coming up, and while we’ve never had to ask “are they having an affair or are they just shy” at one of our shows, we can promise at least one (probably more) audible gasp. Grab your ticket and join us on 7/31 at Seaboard Southend.

Skylar: Emma Watson is just like us... except with a suspended license and a Master’s from Oxford.

For me, Emma has always been one of those celebs that radiate girlie energy. She's smart, stunning, and seemingly normal? True story, I have a friend who went on a date with a guy that dated her, and I just know she has a notes app full of emotionally intelligent takes.

So imagine my surprise with this week’s headline: Emma Watson has been banned from driving in the UK for 6 months. Yes, Hermione Granger herself has had her license suspended after getting caught going 38 in a 30. Honestly? Feels like the most “I’ve definitely done that and just got lucky” scenario.

But plot twist: she already had nine points on her license. And somehow? This makes me love her even more. She is just a girl. Trying to get somewhere. Probably thinking about a metaphor for grief or drafting a sonnet in her head — only to be rudely pulled over for doing something every distracted girlie in a rush has done before.

Oh — and while being an outlaw on UK roads, she’s also currently earning her Master’s in Creative Writing at Oxford. Casual. The way I am seated, buckled, and safely in the speeding limit for whatever she writes.

Building the Band (aka my Saturday afternoon binge). 

Did anyone else stumble upon Netflix’s new singing competition Building the Band where contestants try to form the perfect band based solely on hearing each other's voices and chatting in weirdly private sound booths? No? Just me? Cool.

I don’t know what it is, but I simply cannot resist a singing competition (even if I only ever watch the pilot). Give me a power vocalist with a tragic backstory, an overly confident singer with no tone or pitch, and a former boybander hosting (who, crucially, is not Nick Lachey)? I'm in.

Will I be streaming the songs after the show? No.
Will I remember a single contestant name? Also no.
But will I absolutely cry when the band all sees each other for the first time and someone hits a surprise harmony? 1000%.

I don’t watch these shows to discover a new artist. I watch because I want to hear my favorite pop songs covered in an overly dramatic rendition, while I ask myself: Who is building these Netflix sets and how did they get an LED tunnel of booths inside a warehouse in Burbank?

Carol: The cancellation of The Late Show is a gut punch, especially for comedians who grew up dreaming of one day sitting in that coveted chair. It feels like the start of a death march for the comedy institution of desk interviews and monologues. For many comics, tiny Carol (and adult Carol) included, late-night was (is) the end of the yellow brick road. As audiences shift to streaming and TikTok for commentary, the death of Colbert’s show feels less like a programming change and more like a fade-out of an entire format. Sure, the show was “losing money” year over year but let’s be honest, money is fake, everything is made up, aliens are real, and late-night monologues are one of the few slivers of joy left in the universe. You’ll find me attempting to win lottery tickets until May 2026.

The witches are back. We got our first footage of the Practical Magic remake, and I’ve been tossing salt over my left shoulder ever since, whispering every spell I know that they don’t f*** this up. It didn’t work when they rebooted Frasier, but I’ve planted rosemary by the garden gate since then, so…

Most Halloween movies are too scary for me. But not Practical Magic. Practical Magic holds all of my favorite things in one movie: feminism, blood oaths, midnight margaritas, wise aunts, and my forever dream of being a secret witch among common peasants.

A shocking number of people have said “I’ve never seen the first one” in response to my optimism about the remake. If this is you, the time is now. Sure it’s still summer, but you need the time to watch it at least 5-11 times before the remake premieres.

Plus, it’s still high margarita season (IYKYK).

I learned from TikTok that if you start the movie at 11:13 p.m., you’ll hit the midnight margaritas scene right on time. Did I try this? Yes. Am I a terrible bartender? Yes. Did I make margaritas that could have doubled as gasoline? Also yes. Did boyfriends have to unexpectedly become Ubers? Correct.

Here’s a blurry photo from that night (cropped to protect the innocent). Look at the joy on my face. Look at me clutching the pitcher. In this moment I was confident that if given an umbrella I could float down from my roof.

Dianne West (Jet Owens, far right) and I would have been best friends.

So far, the sneak peek has me feeling cautiously optimistic. Nicole and Sandy, we’re counting on you.

Okay, I’ve been gatekeeping this one… but it’s time.

If you haven’t snagged the Brazil Nut Body Butter or Body Wash from Trader Joe’s — run. It’s a legit dupe for Sol de Janeiro’s Brazilian Bum Bum Cream, smells insane, and it’s only $6.99.

They only get one shipment a season, and it might already be gone, so consider this your sign to stop reading and go sniff every TJ’s in your zip code.

This week the algorithm gave me the ultimate ego boost: the most aspirational serve.

You know when a sponsored ad hits just right and it feels like the algorithm is paying you a compliment? That was me—scrolling in sweatpants when Nantucket Rentals popped up.

Can I afford $2K a night? Absolutely not.
But did I feel deeply seen? Like… yes, I am the kind of woman who summers.

Grab your ticket for our 7/31 at Seaboard Southend show today!

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